Giraffes? Giraffes! – ‘Memory Lame’ (Album Review)

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Giraffes? Giraffes! have, hands down, the best band name of all time.

Those two words also help highlight the fact that this duo are far from ordinary. With a name like Giraffes? Giraffes! you’re hardly going to expect to experience a barrage of generic EDM or nauseating teen-pop; instead, you’re set up to approach with caution. Who knows what freakish tomfoolery might lie beyond the moment you press the play button?

Since you’re reading a review of Memory Lame, it’s going to be difficult to continue without just telling you the answer. This is an absolute mindfuck of a kind-of concept album, telling – mostly without words – a story spread over six tracks comprised of a total of thirty-seven “chapters”. Chapters with titles like these:

“Welcome! Welcome! Welcome!” Shouts A Voice Over The Crashing Waves As A Huge Pile Of Dead Christmas Trees Are Ignited In The Moonlight And I Find A Place To Sit In The Sand.

I Am An Electronic Device Skipping Across The Pavement And Flipping Fucking Wild Into The Woods.

Burning Plastic / Dripping Flame Part 1: Martian Teardrops

The Curious Bird Lands And Tilts Its Head To The Side Like “What’s Up?”

The Coughing Bird Flies Away Like “What The Fuck?”

And finally, the future housewives’ favourite:

Mouthful Of Ash, Fistful Of Ass

If you’re still reading, you’ll probably get on very well with Giraffes? Giraffes! and Memory Lame. Book a therapy session beforehand, and dive into a post-math-rock whirlwind that will leave your mind ravaged and your testicles fully drained (at least if you have them).

You will no longer fully understand what time is. Your limbs will twitch as if possessed as you struggle to recall each twisted moment of the first track alone. You will wake up in the middle of the night, soaked in sweat and mumbling Hug Of Death’s key melodies through dehydrated lips. As for almost everything that comes after third track The Teenagers In The Woods Burning Things Lying Around…I fear I’ve already said too much.

Let’s just leave it there.

At least you can’t say you weren’t warned.

LTK RATING: 85%

Pre-order Memory Lame (out April 27) on Bandcamp.

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Posted on 25 April 2018

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